So I got covid

So it happened. I got covid.

I caught it from my boyfriend, who suddenly had a cough one week. We were hoping it was just something minor, but when I started getting sick we knew it had to be covid. I had a fever, headache, crazy coughs, a really bad sore throat, runny noise, all that terrible stuff. I suffered for a few days and had trouble sleeping. I even lost my voice.

Having covid was so different from what I imagined.

When this whole pandemic first started, I knew a few people who caught covid and they told me they mostly lost their taste but aside from that, they weren’t in bed sick. So I thought I would just chill at home if I ever got it.

Nope, I was in bed sick and I had my taste and I had my appetite, but I couldn’t eat a lot of things because of my throat condition. I was never afraid for my life or anything like that because I am vaccinated and I didn’t see anyone so I wasn’t afraid of anyone else catching it because of me, but man it sucks to be sick.

When I am sick, I mostly miss my mom. I always feel like if my mom was here, she’d know what to do. She’d know exactly what’s in the medicine box. She’ll know what kind of food to cook for me. And I can relax and focus on getting better while she’s doing all the work behind the scenes.

But now that I’ve moved out, mom isn’t here and mom definitely can’t be here because I don’t want her to get covid from me. Instead, my boyfriend and I fumbled our way through tons of tylenol, tissue paper (we ran out so naturally we moved to toilet paper), ordering congee on Ubereats for $13 and chugging water. We survived but I can’t help but think we might’ve been better faster if our moms were here.

I wonder if this feeling ever goes away? I am almost 30 but I cry for my mom when I am sick. It makes me feel like I’ll never be able to become a mother myself because I am clearly still a child.

I ask my boyfriend to do stuff for me my mom would’ve done like put cherry rub on my chest so I can sleep better at night. As I fall asleep to that nostalgic smell in my nostrils, I can’t help but feel bad for all the sick people who don’t have someone else taking care of them.

So even though I have covid, I feel lucky. Because I am being taken care of. Even if it’s not my mom doing it anymore.

Sincerely, Loewe